Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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