"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
did you just send me my own nude
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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