help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
