i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
