How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
