so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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