ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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