Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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