Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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