I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
