I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize
