love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
