So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
