Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
and she was petting her beer can
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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