Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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