he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
