If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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