Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
