and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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