Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
