There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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