I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Randomize
