I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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