Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
