So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
