What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
