i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
