Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
