Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
