Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
