You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
