Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
