i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
