All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
