i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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