He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
