I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize