Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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