ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
