I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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