He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
