I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
