i jhust puked up my retainher.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
