If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
