Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
