Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Randomize
