i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
