i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
