Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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