vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
